I was named by my Parents , who decided Timothy Robert was a rather spiffing choice. Given my Parents relationship with the Church, or at least their adherence with tradition, I was subsequently Baptised and Christened at a Baptist establishment in a small town outside Bristol, and then finally Certified by the State.
All very clean, efficient, and conventional. In all likelihood, also all completed before my first birthday, and almost certainly undertaken under the watchful eyes of Grand Parents and Siblings.
I’m not entirely certain where my given name Timothy came from, other than perhaps a Biblical reference, and an attempt to please my Maternal Grandfather who was a Preacher. My middle name, Robert, was a gift from my Father, who was for the most part known as Bob. I do know my Paternal Grandfather was less than impressed with Timothy, but the decision was made, and it stuck for the last forty odd years.
There is however a problem. Timothy Robert just doesn’t fit. The naming of my existence, came well before the identification of my essence……Our society places huge emphasis on proper names and like it or not, Proper Names convey information beyond simply referring to the referent. As a result, in this part of the world at least, if there is a degree of motivation to integrate correctly, a change of Gender, culturally necessitates a change of name……
Facebook is double edged sword, but this week I was delighted to be able to leverage its power as a mass communication tool. It quickly and easily facilitated the broadcast of a message detailing my ongoing transition to several hundred people around the planet. Not only did it instantly share that message, but it kept me constantly updated as friends, old and new, pledged their support, expressed their surprise, and shared in the joy that comes from being true to oneself.
This evening I have built on that message, and publicly shared my intention to change my name, to match my affirmed Gender…
Suzanne – I really don’t know where this came from, it has been with me for many years. It is as much as part of me as my Love of Art, Passion for Motorcycles and enthusiasm for literature.
Roberta – A small change to my Paternal gift. I’m taking what he gave me and making it mine. Much of what he gave me I am working on giving back. Self Loathing and Anxiety are gifts I no longer want.
Aston – Family History is not my strong point, but the arrival of this name at the end of my own, comes with a degree of responsibility. I have cared for it and I am happy to hand it on, hopefully intact.
The response to the news of my transition and name change has been overwhelmingly positive. I am genuinely moved by the scale of acceptance and support.
As for progress on the transition, it feels like we have moved up a gear. I say we, because this is not a solo endeavour. I am buoyed and propelled forwards by some remarkable people. I seriously underestimated how difficult this task would be, but I also seriously underestimated just how much support would exist.
Suzanne Roberta Aston – <3
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