WASP News

The last 10 days have been challenging.

My Mum passed away a little more than a week ago and I have been fielding calls from the UK ever since. Earlier I  finished off the extremely difficult task of writing Mum’s Eulogy, and in an emotional call this evening I walked through it with my Father and Sister.  I am hoping this will now take pressure off me a little. The feelings are still quite raw and listening to my Sister describe their visit to the Chapel of Rest was a disturbing experience.

A surprise letter from my Endocrinologist has seen me changing the dosage and timings for my medication starting from yesterday. The letter outlines some concerns with the results of my last blood work, especially in conjunction with my recent deep depressive bouts and frequent suicidal feelings. As a result I am immediately changing from the Reverse Sequential Therapy to a more conventional treatment and have been instructed to check in daily with the Mental health team supporting me.

In other news, of a much more positive nature, a visit from some good friends gave me the opportunity to build some confidence. I spent a couple of hours in the company of some supportive and caring people, who were aware of my transition, but had not yet met Suzanne. For all concerned I believe it was a most uplifting experience and the timing could not have been better. I am sure we all learned something, and for me, it was a moment of significant personal growth.

Tomorrow I am scheduled for a further hour of tests, before hopefully putting this rather distressing start to 2016 behind me and getting on with finding myself.

I remain deeply indebted to my tireless partner Jane, who weary and bleary eyed at 3:00 am , listens carefully to the raw emotions pouring out of me, often accompanied by large quantities of tears. She smiles, holds my hand, and tells me everything is going to be ok, that the pain is just temporary and, that all I need to do is let go…….She is one in a Billion, which is why this year I have decided she deserves a Valentines card.

Oh…..and we’ve also taken delivery of a remarkably sophisticated Embroidery machine and a 13 Month Old Puppy….Both fun, difficult to get to grips with and likely expensive in the long run.